Objet d'horreur Pink

Long ago, little girls played with Barbie dolls. They played with these dolls until puberty, upon which they moved on and new little girls took their place. Then one day, the little girls stopped playing with the dolls long before puberty. And with each generation the age of the little girls got younger and younger until 5-year-olds were saying stuff like, "Barbie dolls are for babies."

Realizing that the barn door was now open and they were never going to get those little girls back no matter how many Bratz lawsuits they won, Mattel decided it was much easier to just go after the ex-little girls, in their 20's and 30's (and 40's) since they had more disposable income anyway.

So they did fashion shows with real models and a real beach house in Malibu with celebrity guests and sold Jonathan Adler accessories and Stila makeup. And now there's the new PLASTIC collection, with limited edition art and apparel and decor to appeal to those women who really love their non-biodegradable heroine.

Except...

No, just no.

However, if you do have some kind of Boxing Helena fetish, this lovely foosball set can be yours for the low, low price of $25,000. But act now, only six are available for sale!